October 31, 2009

Funny General Chemistry Moments Part 2

Posted in Chemistry, Humor at 4:56 pm by faith786

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

Assalamu Alaikum,

I guess this is becoming a series just because I am bored in the computer lab and I am procrastinating my CIS homework. These moments can be slightly misquoted due to Faith786’s bad memory.

Some funny gen chem moments:

(There is this really long definition of the first law of thermodynamics on the class powerpoint)


Homer Simpson shows up looking disoriented with the caption: “Huh?”

=story of my life.

Chem Professor: So yes, this is Gay-Lussac who was clearly made fun of (for his name) in middle school….

Random Calc moment:

Calc Professor: So yes, try to solve this problem without a pencil or calculator. Just look at it and tell me the answer.

(Class stares at board blankly)

Calc Professor: I have a dog at home and even he can solve this faster than you.

Faith786’s goal by the end of the semester: try to be smarter than my calc professor’s DOG.


Me: What do you mean when you referred to me as a ‘child of God’?

Chem professor: Oh yes, you have such low self esteem and you forget that you are a child of God.

Me: No, I mean, what did you mean?

Chem Professor: (surprised) That you have low self esteem?

Me: No! What does ‘child of God’ mean?

(This captures all my questions I ask him in class/lab.)

Random CIS (computer class) moments:

(Someone was doing a powerpoint presentation and she stopped talking and the slide did this really prolonged “moo” in the middle of a silent classroom)

Me and CIS professor: That was… AWESOME.

(Talking to someone in my history class  in CIS class)

Me: I cannot believe I got 10% off my midterm because I forgot to mention pimps. Who gets 2% off their final grade in a class because they didn’t talk about pimps?!

CIS Professor (bewildered and amused): I just walked in the wrong end of that conversation….

History professor: So cosmopolitan magazine used to be considered an intellectual periodical for women back in the 30s/40s (can’t remember).

Me: Why?

History professor: Because women used to take whatever it said seriously. Like, if there was a review on vacuum cleaners, people would trust the magazine’s judgment. People wouldn’t buy a vacuum cleaner if someone who reviewed it said something like: “This vacuum sucks! and not in the good way.”

Lab moments:

(While working with a thermometer in a tube of hot oil)

Friend: He (chem professor) is coming make sure everything is working.

Me: Okay… hold on.

(Professor comes and he looks at my apparatus and my ‘recorded’ results critically.)


Chem Professor: So, do you write poetry?

Me: What?!?

Chem Professor: (My name) did you read the lab before coming today?

Me: Yes… that is why I asked if I can modify the procedure and do that part seperately instead of together… what kind of question is that? I have to read the lab ahead of time in order to know what I am supposed to do now.

Chem Professor: Good. You pass (the class).

(I am leaning on my knees on a stool with wheels trying to *fix* my lab set up because I am too short/the part I needed to fix was too high up)

Me: (Friend’s name) can you get that orange book and put it behind these two tubes so I can see if the water level is equal?

(Friend stands in front of me and she puts the book behind the set up, making sure she isn’t hitting me, my arms or the glassware I am holding.)

Me: Can you keep your hands still? The book keeps hitting the tube and the water gets agitated.

Friend: Can you hurry up and just fasten it already?

(I am shaking because I am on a stool with wheels holding glassware with water in both hands and my friend is shaking trying not to move the book or hit me.)


Me and my friend (we turn our heads): huh?

Chem Professor (holding a camera, smiling): Lab students at work.

Friend: This is NOT the time to take a photo!



  1. Le Mystique said,

    Interesting and funny…
    Regarding the child of God thing… I wonder if your professor believes anyone who is religious/theist has low self esteem..?..

  2. faith786 said,

    Oh no, I once emailed him some questions and I apologized if they seemed stupid (some of them quite were) and he told me not to put my self-esteem on the line for a set of questions because I was a child of God. So one day at school I asked him what that phrase meant (because I thought he was referencing Plato–which he was not) and he told me that meant I was a creation of God and I should not be so harsh on myself.

    Ironically, the next week lab I had to stay late because my reaction took forever and he was working on something. I asked him what he was doing and he said he was working on the next day’s lecture that he knows no one will pay attention in.

  3. Le Mystique said,

    Aha… so he was saying it in a nice way… he is very kind..
    The way the incident was written, it made me make all the wrong suspicions..
    My bad 🙂

  4. naasara said,

    He is very kind!
    He should realize that Muslims don’t like the intimation that God has children.
    He was getting into theological territory where He did not mean to go.

  5. Lenna said,

    I can relate to having my questions misinterpreted in class. And I know exactly what it is like to have crazy lab photos.

    Sounds like people at your school don’t know too much about how to interact with Muslims. Do you ever bother to correct other students or your professors? How do you think situations like the ‘child of God’ should be handled? Have you had others?.

  6. faith786 said,

    I think this humor section just got a little serious. =)


    Those were a number of questions, so I decided to email you instead!

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