June 25, 2008

My Epiphanies (VII)

Posted in Aqidah, Character, Epiphanies, Islam, Knowledge, Sufism, Taqwa, Tazkiyah at 1:50 pm by faith786

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

Assalamu alaikum,

(I am starting to forget which epiphany number I am typing, lol.)

So I am currently stuck at college waiting for my next class. I am taking two classes this summer and there is a 3&1/2 hour break in between. I did not get much sleep last night, so I really wanted to go home between my two classes to catch a nap. Guess what? I am not. So I am taking this time to think and come up with this epiphany.

Ever since the latter half of my senior year of high school, I got a cell a phone. It had four primary functions: make a call, get a call, send a text message and get a text message. And a night light. So maybe it has a fifth function. Anyway, I never regarded it much, but then something has shocked me today. (I said that so stoically)

I realized half way in my first class this morning that I left my cell phone in the house. I thought, “Whatever, I don’t use it much but to call people anyway.” But then my class ended and I was am REALLY TIRED and hungry, so I wanted to go home. I asked my parents this morning if someone can pick me up after class, and I realized I left my cell, so they would probably call it before picking me up. Little do they know I left it in the house.

But I kept thinking and I checked my bag–I also forgot my wallet AND the books for my next class in the house because I thought I was going back home. I left the house without breakfast, my books and I had the arrogance to think I could predict the future that I was going to go back home for a couple hours. I FORGOT TO SAY INSHA’ALLAH AND MY DUAAS THIS MORNING. (I felt like God played a practical joke on me, but not one out of cruelty, but out of love. Better this way than me learning through sinning.)

So I smacked my forehead in the library when I figured this out, but I felt a little insecure knowing that I don’t have my wallet or my cell phone. And then I smacked my head multiple times in the library–WAS MY CELL PHONE AND MY WALLET MY ILAH(s)?!?!?!?! I mean, their presence/absence in my pocket should not affect me in anyway. God is my provider, my protector, my guardian and my love. He’ll watch over me. Always. (He is all Seeing too, so no exaggeration there.)

So being stuck at college taught me a two fold of a lesson. Who would ever think that a stupid thing(s) as a wallet or a cell phone can actually be an ilah? So I realized that I need to watch how I regard things. Anyway, it might not be a mind blowing epiphany for all of you, but for me, it snapped some old chords.

And now I shall take a nap because I don’t have my books, and i am hungry and I cannot purchase food. I should have fasted today, but I brushed my teeth this morning. Nuts.

But the bigger thing I am wondering is: are there other things that I may have mistaken as ilahs and they are going unchecked?

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1 Comment »

  1. Noreen said,

    I never thought little things could be an ilah. Whenever you hear ilah, you think of idols or something, but it could even be a cell phone! Wonderful epiphany. Thank you for sharing it.


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